NutGas Emergency Ends After Neighborhood Evacuation; Friday Tournament Cleared to Proceed
The NutGas emergency is over. The neighborhood has been reopened, the man in the coconut cup has been removed, and Friday night’s tournament is…
BREAKING: EPA Declares Former Poker In The Wood Host House a Level-4 Biological Hazard
The EPA has classified the former DeBeck residence — a founding PITW host home — as a Level-4 Biological Atmosphere Anomaly Site. Marland remains…
The Mondo Bounty: An Oral History of How One Man’s Quiet Excellence Made Him a 🦪 20 Clams Bill With Legs
Mondo was good at poker. The league put a bounty on him. Bish collected it. Marcel collected the Bish bounty in the same night.…
Mondo Got Bounty’d by Bish, Bish Got Bounty’d by Marcel: The Circle of Chips Is Unbroken
Bish collected Mondo's bounty (+20). Marcel collected Bish's bounty (+20). In the same tournament. In that order. Nobody planned the Circle of Chips. The…
The 2025 Season Report: Billy Finally Wins It All As Tim’s 116-Point Eruption Is Logged As A Geological Event
Lore · The 2025 Season After a founder’s decade in the wilderness, the dynasty falls — and a man named Tim registers on the…
The 2024 Season Report: Bish Reclaims The Throne As Former Champion Jim D Finishes With One (1) Lonely Point
Lore · The 2024 Season Bish hoards a second Donkey while a former king is recovered, statistically speaking, from beneath the table. The League…
The 2023 Season Report: Terry Named Donkey Of The Year, Insists The Honor Is Both Real And An Insult
Lore · The 2023 Season Champion accepts trophy, files grievance against trophy in same breath. WOODLAND COMPLEX — In a development the League Historical…
The 2022 Season Report: Bish Edges Terry By Two Points In A Finish So Close Both Men Filed Complaints
Lore · The 2022 Season Two-point margin triggers dual grievance filings, one disputed ottoman, and the longest recount in League history. The League Historical…
The 2020 Season Report: Pandemic-Shortened Campaign Decided By Two Clams, Bish Declared Champion Of Whatever That Was
Lore · The 2020 Season A 20-Donkey field, a handful of tournaments, and a championship decided by the approximate weight of two damp Clams.…
The 2019 Season Report: Javier Wins Title, Credits Victory To Nut Gas And Refuses To Explain Further
Lore · The 2019 Season Champion logs 459 points, zero explanations, and one (1) ongoing federal-adjacent inquiry into the air around his chair. The…